Someone whose actions are unkind . . .

Someone in my life has been causing me a lot of pain for the last week or so.  There is no real reason for his cruelty.  I have acted kindly, and even generously, toward him on scores of occasions.  I know that I have done nothing to deserve the mean way in which he presently behaves.   It has seemed to me that he acts as he does now just for the sake of causing pain.   In a world in which he controls little, perhaps it makes him feel more powerful to know he can act cruelly.   

Last night I found this quotation at the Blue Cliff Monastery site --

Someone whose actions are unkind, whose thoughts are unwholesome, whose speech is unwholesome, is certainly suffering a lot. When you look deeply and see this suffering, your heart will open and the key of understanding will reveal itself.

-- Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh

So, as I deal with the pain he is causing me, I try to remember that his actions are prompted by his own pain.   (If only I could interrupt this cycle.   But he is determined that he shall continue on his present course, no matter how destructive it is to himself (and it is), and no matter how unfair to me.)

Comments

[Loren]

Here's hoping he soon sees the error of his ways.

[Tom]

Your comments bring back struggles I've endured. So I can't NOT comment. You are good! Continue to fight the good fight! Your willingness to see the suffering in the one who causes YOUR suffering is the work of God in you. You're an inspiration. I will be holding you--and him--in prayer. Peace!

[Avocat]

Loren, thank you for your supportive comment. It is appreciated.

[Avocat]

Tom, I wish I deserved your compliments. I'm struggling with my own feelings. The Zen quote really does help me. So do your kind thoughts. Thank you!

[Tom]

Keara! Forget what you think you have deserved! It's what you have given and received that counts. You have given Something Beautiful. Accept, receive the peace of the Divine Presence. It is yours! You are loved!